The moment when total darkness turns into light is when the moon reveals shadows like a beacon in the night. We all have it—a shadow side. It’s the alter ego that destroys relationships, fells families and leaves that nasty aftertaste. It’s what you do when you lapse into default mode at the first hint of trouble and feel the worst that your feelings can conjure. It’s that twisted colon, gut shot, heart attack pain that knots around you when you’re confronted by that dastardly feeling you claim you’ve spent your whole life purging in therapy. But you haven’t. You’ve failed. And you don’t know what’s worse—failing to purge the pain of your past or failing to admit you haven’t. Welcome to the

This blog also appeared as a guest post on Dragon Intuitive, Feb. 18, 2013. I have a goat. He’s a boy. I named him Billy. I know how unoriginal that is. He’s also a professional eater. As I sit here on the creek bank, listening to the forest while babble flows freely through my head, he hovers near, chomping on the thorniest, pokiest, vilest of weeds with incisors made of hardened steel. Frankly, I think he’s in heaven. Hell, he was made for this. In stark contrast to his black coat, he also has a completely white ass. I mean the entirety of his behind—fur as well as sphincter—is bright glowing white. So is his muzzle. I grin at the significance of a professional eater having a mouth and ass

On December 14th, mid-morning, I was enjoying a bowl of homemade soup, an item I had eaten the night before and finished, giddy for the onset of breakfast so I could have more. I sat, admiring the richness of the broth made from organic ingredients. My attempt at super clean living had only lightly been entertained until a diagnosis of Lyme Disease put me instantly, intimately in touch with the importance of long-term health. I was also engaged in another new practice: being in the moment; fostering the feeling of love and graciousness in the present, cultivating an emotion of love for everything I had at that instance. A few states away, a young man armed with really bad thoughts, gunned do